StephSF

Old La Honda Road is one of those streets that you would expect to see on some TV show on cutting-edge real estate. In fact, the street almost doesn't even need to have a name, because each house has its own little road leading up to it. While a near death trap to get to up narrow switchbacks, each home boasts cutting-edge architecture with wood finishes, nestled behind redwood groves and built on the side of a mountain.

There is no doubt that these houses are owned by wealthy Silicon Valley executives, although pricing may tell you otherwise; while the homes run in the millions, they remain in the single digits and are nowhere near as expensive as their counterparts at a lower elevation.

I have no clue how (or if) people do the commute on a daily basis, or even get groceries for that matter; this has to be one of the most twisted, narrow roads I have seen in the Bay Area, making Highway 9 look like the autobahn. But if I had a couple million dollars burning a hole in my pocket, I would certainly look here.

Given that there is no true spot to review the ferry cruises around the bay, this seems to be the best spot for this, given that this is where they depart from. While this is not something that I would necessarily recommend for locals, it is a nice way for tourists to see the bay and experience some fantastic San Francisco views.

The narration of the cruise is a little cheesy - one part Disney world, one part old cartoon - but it is still fun, and you can avoid the speakers by sitting on the side of the boat. The ferry takes you under the Golden Gate Bridge, around Alcatraz and back to the pier in an hour. It's a cool view that, as they boast on the loudspeaker "no commuter gets to see."

Would I recommend doing this with a bunch of local friends? At $24/head, probably not. But if you have some visitors coming in from out of town, it is a lot of fun.

In a city practically defined by its abundance of parks, Yerba Buena Gardens can appear to be the size of a pin on a map showing the Presidio, but that doesn't mean it doesn't have its place. In the bustling SOMA district, this park is a great break for city dwellers looking for a simple patch of green in a sea of buildings.

The park is well laid out and very pretty; the stone benches make it appear more like a botanical garden and less like a regular park, but the green lawn certainly provides some lounge space as well. Skaters and jugglers may be showing off their skills, but will not be overbearing.

My only problem with this park is the strict "no ball sports of any kind" rule. I was there with a group last week and got some trouble for having them hit a birdie with a badminton racket for all of a minute. Given the fact that people will just as likely offer you drugs in this park, it seems a bit extreme to berate people for using miniature tennis rackets in a public park, but at the same time I got a warning and wasn't even issued a slap on the wrist, so I don't think they generally enforce their rules too heavily.

The reviews of Fisherman's Wharf always crack me up, because they are SO searingly bad through the eyes of locals. The most important thing to keep in mind is that if you are a local, you will NOT hang out here, as the area is designed entirely as a tourist stop. The only times I have ever been here have been with out-of-town visitors, and the place is such a spectacle that it is even worth the trip.

Street artists have a stronger presence here than in any other neighborhood in San Francisco which is nice for several reasons. First and foremost, they provide some entertainment value for those seeking it. Second, and perhaps more importantly, they are here for the people who want to see them and therefore do not get in the way of people in other parts of the city who want nothing to do with break dancers and moving statues.

The tourist vibe extends beyond the street artists to the entertainment, which includes everything from a cheap Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum knockoff, to a Ripley's Believe it or Not Museum, to boat tours, to the overpriced food of Hard Rock Cafe. Beyond this restaurant, the food is actually pretty good for a tourist trap and includes an abundance of seafood spots (all claiming to serve the best crab in San Francisco), clam chowder (usually with bacon - non-meat eaters beware!) and all the Ghiradelli chocolate any woman could ever ask for. Not too shabby for tourist central.

Beyond that, you will find your fair share of souvenir shops (all set in the venue of an outdoor mall), Gray Line tour buses, and boat cruises leaving Piers 39-45. It's not for locals, but it gives a huge injection of San Francisco stereotype to anyone looking for foggy, chocolate-covered Rice-a-Roni. And hey, it can even be fun every so often, in the same way that New Yorkers can find Times Square fun.

As a matter of fact, San Franciscans should be thanking Fisherman's Wharf for pulling all of the cheesy tourist things to one centralized area that is out of the way of their daily commute and far enough removed from the rest of the city that they can avoid it at all costs without even trying. Take that, Times Square!

Novato is Marin County’s northernmost town and borders on Sonoma County, but is much more high-end yuppie developments and less wine country meets farm country. Unlike its southern neighbor, San Rafael, Novato is comprised primarily of very wealthy older adults and families. Aside from a few less developed areas close to the interstate, the area is very white-bread, with some strong East Coast influences.

Three-bedroom houses in the more compact developments with no backyards can run close to a million dollars, and while the beautiful hillside views and a near-perfect climate are great, it is tough to justify the price.

Marin County, especially northern Marin County, is far less attractive to young professionals than comparable towns and neighborhoods on the Peninsula. While both are family-friendly, Marin lacks the density of fun, popular downtown areas and trendy restaurants that one will find in towns like Palo Alto and Redwood City. However, if you want a safe, family-oriented bubble with great hiking in the hills, and proximity to San Francisco, Wine Country, and the redwoods, Novato may just be the ideal place.

Livermore is hot in the summer, cold in the winter, suburban, and kind of far from San Francisco and the coast, but it is good for one very unique thing - it provides a reasonably affordable place to live that is safe, comfortable, and in the Bay Area.

There are some other perks to this town, including wineries, proximity to Mount Diablo, Rose Peak, and other great outdoor activities, and lots of sunshine. The downtown area is actually pretty cool, and all things considered, traffic isn't too bad. 580 can get you right to Oakland in a half hour, and is a gateway to Yosemite and the Sierras.

If you are looking to live anywhere in the Bay Area and are on a tight budget, you may want to consider Livermore.

Scotts Valley is a cool town for many reasons - any place that is built around the coastal redwoods is going to be unique and scenic. The proximity to Santa Cruz makes it a great home base for anyone who is interested in the Northern California beach life without the "alternative" culture of Santa Cruz.

This suburb doesn't have a booming nightlife, but it does have its fair share of unique restaurants, making it a good place for people both young and old - although the price tag makes it prohibitive for much of the population.

University South has a lot going on - perhaps even more than Downtown North. With an abundance of everything from restaurants to bars to yoga studios, it is probably the most packed couple of blocks in Palo Alto. While it is an exciting place to be, it is also home to the most traffic and the least parking of anywhere in the area.

Staples around here include Pizza My Heart, Coupa Cafe and Reposado, but new venues seem to pop up every month. This is probably one of the best places for restaurants and nightlife in Silicon Valley, and the prices certainly reflect this!

Like many major urban downtown areas, San Jose feels a little bit like a room that has just been sprayed down by Lysol - appears nice on the outside, but needs a lot of cleaning up below the surface.

By day, it is a vibrant urban area with major technology corporations galore and five-star restaurants to fuel their hungry, well-paid staff. As soon as five o'clock rolls around, however, the commuters start to disappear and are replaced by homeless people. The restaurants empty out. The businesses close down.

Nightlife is a bit more of a "local" scene, with individuals flocking to the loud array of dance clubs in what appears to look somewhat like a red light district. There are some good places (Single Barrel is my favorite 1920s-style bar), but overall it feels a bit trashy at night.

The tech museum is probably the highlight for out-of-town visitors.

Downtown Palo Alto has the look and feel of a quaint, charming town - with the traffic and the crowds to remind you that it is anything but. With an Apple store, the Ideo headquarters, and the former home of Facebook itself, not to mention droves of Silicon Valley professionals, this place practically BREATHES technology, second only to downtown Mountain View (home of Google) and San Jose, respectively.

It meets its wealthy clientele needs with its fair share of restaurants, including an abnormal of the French-themed variety. La Strada (Italian), Joya (Tapas) and Epi (French Cafe) are all surefire bets (I can give recommendations for each), and Crepevine is a Bay Area classic as well. You pretty much can't go wrong wherever you dine.

The biggest problem is parking, which is nearly impossible to find during happy hour, and is limited to two hours only in many places. If you want to stick around for the day, your best bet is to buy a parking pass in advance or park at the garage underneath Bank of America (neither of which are particularly convenient options). Times are enforced pretty heavily, so heed to these rules and you will be fine.

If you are just driving through, it is strongly advised to take either Lytton or Everett, which run parallel to University with a fraction of the traffic. Don't be wary of checking out these streets, which have a fair share of restaurants and bars of their own.

Because of the crowds, this could be a tough spot to raise a family, although anything in Palo Alto is a surefire bet to breed intelligent overachievers with a wealth of opportunity in their backyard (literally!)

Ocean Beach is not exactly the sun and sand of California, but it is a beach in the middle of San Francisco. This means public transportation access, shops all around, and of course, killer waves. Surfers enjoy this beach because of its clean breaks and lack of drainage pipe anywhere nearby (any surfer's nightmare after a day of rain - think massive sewage overload), and kite-boarders get their fair share of wind here.

Even rock climbers have a spot all to themselves near the Cliff House, with a series of boulder problems (think climbing low to the ground, with no rope, and a crash pad underneath you) that have a perfect sandy landing.

If none of these sports appeal to you, then just relax and enjoy the surf and the sunset! Just be wary of fog and cooler temperatures - this is not San Diego!

While the city is a far cry from where it was fifteen years ago when murders ran rampant, one could argue that it still has a long way to go. Drive through this town at any time of day and you are likely to see souped-up police cars with their signal lights on, driving into a nondescript drive to take care of god-knows-what drug bust. It's a common sight that you are disillusioned to after living here long enough.

I have been here for nearly eight months, and while I certainly prefer being in this suburb to a more urban working-class neighborhood like Oakland or SF's Mission District, it is not the town itself that keeps me going. I spend very little time here other than to sleep and do laundry, and am perfectly content with the proximity to Palo Alto, SF, Santa Cruz and its mountain range, the East Bay, San Jose, and everything else that Silicon Valley has to offer. I did not initially feel unsafe until a home break-in shook me up and made me diligent about utilizing our new home alarm system. Generally, I tell my friends that I live in Palo Alto; if I say I am in EPA, half of them look at me with sheer pity while the other half don't even know that it is a separate town.

The town is due for a massive overhaul, and momentum from the local government has propelled it forward. Construction projects abound and I am confident that ten years from now, this will be just like every other expensive city in the area. However, don't be fooled into thinking that you are getting a steal when buying a house - this town is still in one of the Forbes top 500 most expensive zip codes in the country, despite once being the murder capital of America, thanks to nearby Menlo Park, Atherton and Palo Alto.

If you can afford to, the best investment opportunity here would be to buy a home near an empty lot that will surely be turned into a business center, refurbish everything that you can, live in it for the minimum one-year requirement found on many home loans and get roommates to help with the mortgage, then rent it out and go live elsewhere. You will get the bang for your buck in the long run, and can still enjoy being in the Bay Area without having to deal with late-night sirens and gang meetings. There are worse places to live, but there are certainly better ones, too.

In the meantime, be prepared to drive to nearby towns to run your day-to-day errands, or spend abnormal amounts of time sitting in traffic at the Ravenswood Shopping Center next to 101.

I haven't spent too much time here, but 20th street is home to Great Western Power Company, Oakland's only rock climbing gym. Because gyms are generally built in old industrial warehouse buildings, they are generally found in up-and-coming neighborhoods, and 20th street is no exception. It is near both Broadway and Telegraph, which gives the whole area the feel of a nice business district during the day.

At night, the area feels more like a deserted business district, a la downtown Denver or Phoenix. It is Oakland, after all - but there are some cool-looking bars to make the deserted area feel a little more populated. The mix of natives and East Bay hipsters give the area a unique feeling. I wouldn't want to walk around there alone at night, but I am also not partial to eerily quiet areas in cities.

The newly gentrified Mission District, while somewhat sketchy depending on where you go, has got to be one of my favorite neighborhoods in the city. Valencia Avenue is the true heart of the area, with a great mix of bars and restaurants that are very local-friendly. The Phoenix is always great for a late-night beer in an Irish Pub atmosphere, and nearby Ali Baba's cafe has the best falafel wraps in SF, in my opinion.

Venture over to the district's namesake, Mission Street, and it's another story. The area is still very closely tied to the its Mexican influences, which gives the whole neighborhood a completely different feel. Cancun

The area is also home to Mission Cliffs Climbing Gym, a go-to spot for many city-based adventure seekers. The gym hosts regular climbing competitions, as well as your standard selection of climbing clinics and yoga classes.

Further south, some of the residential areas feel a little sketchy. As a female, I don't really want to walk around Shotwell or even Cesar Chavez alone at night. Even when I go out in this neighborhood, I try to park my car as close to wherever I am as possible.

Overall, this is a fun and relatively affordable neighborhood for the area if you are careful. Have fun, and be safe!

EDIT: Everything below was written in October 2010 and still stands, with the following two paragraphs written in February 2011...

I spent a week living at the Financial District Hilton and had to drive there via 3rd Street several times. The stretch of this street from King all the way to Market, particularly the last couple of blocks (it runs one-way), is potentially the WORST traffic I have seen in any city driving. It definitely rivals the Holland Tunnel exiting New York City on a Friday afternoon, or the D.C.-area Beltway right after a snowstorm.

The problem essentially lies in the lights. The timing is absurd and completely haphazard, somewhat dictated by the needs of pedestrians and subsequently so out of synch with one another that you could easily sit through the same light four times before getting to drive through it and moving onto the next one. Given that blocks are short and streets cannot be blocked by cars, there is very little leeway for movement during green lights, and the result is a debacle similar to the popular puzzle game "traffic jam" - but the real-life version! Don't be surprised if two miles here takes you twenty minutes to drive.

*****************************************************************************************************************

3rd Street gets a bad rap for starting out in the Bayview/Hunter's Point slums, but it gets better much quickly. With proximity to AT&T Park and Downtown SF, it has plenty to offer, including a stretch of restaurants, shops and the SF MoMA.

This is not the best walking street, but traffic flow here is pretty smooth and there is a very nice Archstone apartment complex (just about the only housing on the north side of the street). Best of all , it is home to several $10 flat rate parking lots that take the stress out of driving into the city.

I almost would want to get married here, if it weren't for the perpetually chilly weather. The Sonoma Coast up here is beautiful, if you can handle the exciting, hilly, winding, twisting drive. Beach views abound over cliff tops hundreds of feet high, and when the tide is pumping, you just might see some surfers on the beach enjoying the clean breaks. The area is a surfer/kiteboarder/kayaker's paradise, and rock climbers can find plenty to do as well.

It is a little under two hours from San Francisco, depending on traffic and where you are coming from, but for many people, the views and seclusion are worth it. Be prepared for abysmal cell phone reception in most spots.

You will find yourself sharing the area with road bikers, Mendonoma hippies and even some retirees, but none of them seem to mind as there is plenty of space to go around.

..but not as scenic as one may expect. Skyline Boulevard does have the advantage of being nestled in the redwoods and madrones, and being accessible to EVERY state park, but the trees also block any vistas of oceans or valleys. While lookouts do exist, you will spend more time driving through trees than alongside cliffs.

It is somewhat twisty, but not as bad as the access roads (9, 84, etc.), given that it runs along the ridgeline of the Santa Cruz mountains. The easiest access is via 17 in Los Gatos. Cell phone access is spotty, but does exist in some places depending on who your carrier is, and the cost of living anywhere in the area is through the roof. Also, be aware that if you live here you will have to likely drive 20 minutes or more to get to the nearest grocery store.

But if you are okay with being isolated in such a populated and expensive area, the scenery and seclusion just may be worth it. Otherwise, if you want a scenic drive, take the 1.

I haven't spent much time here, but I have driven through many times and I do know that Lombard Street is a part of highway 101, which has the genius design move of running directly through San Francisco. The area is fairly populated and it there is some shopping, but there will always be cars in the area. Fortunately, for those of you using this as a commuter street only, it is not nearly as bad as the nearby Van Ness.

The surrounding neighborhood is quite nice but certainly comes with the San Francisco price tag. Relax, bring your ipod (and a car adapter because no radio adapter will work in San Francisco), and remind yourself that the Golden Gate Bridge is not far off.

This is definitely a working-class street in every sense of the word, minus the Kaiser Permanente smack dab in the middle. But the neighborly spirit is definitely alive here, as I learned with no fewer than two examples just recently:

1. I went to the Salvation Army to go donate some used clothing. I pulled into the parking lot, stepped out, and started to wander around trying to figure out where I was going. A little girl, who couldn't have been more than ten years old, approached me, asked me if I was looking to donate, and told me where I needed to go (the location down the road). All that without even asking - I've had paid sales associates in Palo Alto ignore me when I've tried to ask where to locate something.

2. In the same breath, I went to Napa Auto Parts to get a headlight replaced. I have no knowledge of car repair and made this very clear to the man at the counter, who said that "they don't touch the vehicles." I asked again, joking that I wouldn't tell, and he came out to take a look. When he couldn't figure out how to do it, another guy came out a minute later to check it out and said "I can't make any promises, I'm just a customer." When HE couldn't manage, they sent a third guy out, a mechanic (also a customer), who made it work no problem and then gave me an unsolicited estimate on what I needed to get fixed on my engine. So TWO customers, none of whom were required to give me the time of day, gave me the helping hand that I needed.

So if that is the treatment that the people in the area give me, I don't even really care what the rest of the street holds...

On the surface, this town doesn't look like the ideal place for someone to settle down in. Ocean Avenue is peppered with gas stations, motels, and auto body shops, and the downtown area has its fair share of drug users. The drive from San Francisco takes several hours and takes you through both congested suburbs and windy back roads, and the homes are as modest as they come for a beach town in Northern California. And the bipolar weather can be frigid and foggy in the morning and blisteringly hot in the afternoon when the fog burns off.

Yet somehow, I always find myself wistfully thinking "I want to live here" whenever I visit. Something about the crisp ocean air, the omnipresent surfer culture, and the fun late-night scene smack dab in the middle of lovely Northern California tempts me to stick around every time I visit. Cost of living is expensive by real-world standards but reasonable compared to nearby towns, given that it IS a college town. Head to El Palomar for happy hour $3 burritos, or enjoy one of the many craft beers at Seabright Brewery (dogs welcome!) Tap into the massive tap selection at Burger, or check out the legendary surf museum and learn about how the idyllic sport, admired and envied by many around the world, was invented and developed.

For those who prefer the mountains to the beach lifestyle, there is no shortage of redwood-lined hiking trails or mountain biking. Nearby state parks prevail and allow for overnight adventures and rock climbing, and if surfing is not your cup of tea, paddleboarding and sea kayaking are popular, viable options as well.

On the down side, there is a strong subculture of a drug-filled lifestyle, and apparently several gangs do exist. I would recommend living closer to the foothills if you are raising a family, although the lively downtown area is certainly appealing for the younger crowd.

I want to give a fair assessment for those whose priorities differ, but I unabashedly love this town! It definitely feeds the California beach addiction while still allowing you to live the laid-back NorCal lifestyle.